Please Let Us Breathe!

November 15, 2017 - 4 Comments

So today, I am going to touch on a subject that a lot of people have experienced. Tabia mbaya kwa mathree.

Have you ever entered a mat or KBS on an extremely hot or rainy day and you immediately start regretting why you went in in the first place? Yaani kuna wasee huwanga na matabia fishy kwa mat na leo ni siku ya exposé. Are you ready?

I don’t know if it is just me, but I usually get very frustrated when it’s too hot or raining heavily and you all enter a jav and everybody has their window closed. Like wasee, mnataka nidie!!! There is literally no fresh air mpaka mist inaform kwa windows. Worst thing is when you’re not sitting next to a window and the guy next to the window refuses to open it eti juu kuna baridi. Bruh!!! I just can’t.

wiseGEEK

Swala la pili ni wale wasee huingia mat na wanaketi ni kama wako home alafu wanamalizia wenzao space pale kwa kiti. Really??? I find it super annoying, then when you tell someone to move a bit they give you a daggering look. Listen, I am just as stressed out with this life as you are, so kindly, let us make it easier for each other. Sharing is caring, so nisongee tu, pia me nalipa fare tu kama wewe.

Google

Alafu kuna hawa very weird passengers, and 9 out of 10 times, it’s usually  mamis. Umefika pale Odeon then you see a jav is full save for the conductor’s seat. Si you know nowadays we have traffic laws right? So wewe unaamua kukaa pale kwa ile kiti ukijua tu vizuri conda ako pale mbele na atakuforce usonge. So the dere by passes traffic and you get to Koja and the conda hops in and squeezes himself on the same seat that you’re on. Kidogo kidogo you start complaining that conda anakufinya na eti utaanguka kwa hiyo space hapo katikati claiming that you can’t fit.

Google

Then there is this other breed of Kenyans, I just can’t. So you enter a jav, sit by the window and start thinking of how you need to buy an Island by 25 and how you need to meet and get married to your prince charming, when this guy comes and partially sits on you and leaves no room for personal space. Like what’s the problem here? Do you simply want to get as close to me as possible or don’t you like personal space?

Google

If you’re feeling me can I get a hell yeah! Okay okay, so I would also like to talk about those people who usually listen to the radio or songs on their phones bila earphones. Like what is your problem? Earphones and headphones were created for a special reason, to allow an individual to enjoy their songs or favorite radio show in peace. Kindly, let us make good use of these very special devices that tech guys take a lot of time to create. Maybe someone is there trying to think of how to propose to his babe and you’re there interrupting his chain of thought. You feel me?

Google

This goes out to all the people who like or have to travel to their shagz using public means. So this time we were travelling to Shagz with my sister and we get to the stage, 14 passengers board the mat and off we go. Haya tuko Thika road, kidogo kidogo past Githurai I hear the conductor asking people ‘siste unaenda?’ So I naturally look behind and I see the mat is at full capacity, 14 passengers but no, the dere stops. “Thika Thika Thika” the conductor yells and people come running towards the car. He pulls out a small rectangular piece of wood and inserts them in between the two seats in between the very front and back seats. Kidogo kidogo, an extra person hops onto the very front seat, another one on the back seat, two people sit on the wooden pieces and the last one on the conductor’s seat. Before I knew it, the 14 seater jav was carrying 19 people!!! I think you can imagine how the rest of the journey was. Ata sitawasumbua na details hapa LOL!

Google

Last one! Last one! So this time on my way to Kilimani from tao, I panda a 46 pale Kencom and sit at the second last seat from the back. I am there enjoying my free promotional Minute Maid Pulpy Orange (tasting the pulp in every gulp) when I hear this lady answer a call and speak as though she’s addressing the entire bus. So I think to myself that she’ll be done in like two minutes coz kawaida, guys don’t speak too long in a jav coz they don’t want everyone listening in on their conversation. Can you believe the lady spoke for almost 20 minutes! By the time I was getting off the bus, I could literally hear the lady’s voice ringing in my head. Eehh the struggles some of us have to go through!

Google

Enough about me now, what are some of the peculiar things you have experienced in javs? Tell me all about it.

Waithesh

COMMENTS

  • Nerea Nesh November 21, 2017 at 6:52 am

    I see we got mutual concerns. Why are people like this, weren’t they told about some good morals to apply in life. kwanza wale wasee hukuwekea elbow yao on your chest waki chat using their cellphones. I wonder, is that an accademic angle for chat??!! #smh.

    Reply
  • Erikoh November 21, 2017 at 8:43 am

    Yes!..
    Another one goes to those guys especially wanaume who come sit next to you then start sleeping wanakulalia alafu wanakumwagia mate..manze haidai kabisa!..Nyahunyo kwao!..

    Reply
  • KimtuKIEUSI November 21, 2017 at 9:56 am

    Hiyo ya tumbao soo annoting like kenyas dnt know the capacity of a ma3…whats wrong with kenyans…..last i hate loud voices especially in closed quarters

    Reply
  • Sco November 24, 2017 at 2:19 pm

    Hahaha I feel you. 100% kwanza those guys of listening to music on loudspeaker, ama playing whatsapp videos!! Gaah! Wengine wetu javing is the only time/place we get to reflect and/or nap kidogo.
    Na watu wa kukalia kiti as if they’ve paid for BOTH seats! Jameni! This is not your house/couch, stay in your lane!

    Reply